Self-doubt with all the ensuing consequences of this fact. The reasons, symptoms and methods of dealing with the existing problem will become clear from the article. An inferiority complex is a combination of a person's emotional and psychological perception of the surrounding world in a distorted form. It is expressed in a sense of personal inferiority against the background of the irrational rise above themselves of the majority of representatives of society. When comparing the inner "I" with other people, a person with a similar problem begins to consider himself a defective thing, which further leads to neurosis and even an attempt at suicide.
Causes of an inferiority complex
To get rid of a feeling of inferiority, one should listen to the opinion of specialists who see low self-esteem in a child and an adult in the following provoking factors:
- Childhood problems … In this case, we will talk about two sides of the coin, which ultimately lead to a sad result. Parents can either organize overprotection of their children, or completely deprive them of their care and attention. In the first case, the child develops an inability to become an independent person, in the second, the inclinations of an insecure person are formed.
- Physical disabilities … The causes of inferiority complexes are often rooted in unwillingness to see your face and figure in the mirror. Sometimes this is just a contrived problem with a rather attractive appearance. However, one must take into account the factor that a person may actually have physical defects. Women are usually worried about their appearance, and men are concerned about the size of the penis.
- The negative impact of society … Some "well-wishers" do not skimp on negative assessments of overly impressionable people. Having chosen such a victim for themselves and having created an inferiority complex in her, they wish in this way to assert themselves at someone else's expense.
- Criticism of loved ones … If discontent from outsiders can be ignored, then impartial comments from relatives can hurt anyone. He begins to think that he is listening to extremely constructive criticism about his worthlessness.
- Bad luck … If Fortune constantly deprives people of their attention, then they may consider this a sign of their own inferiority. Against the background of more successful acquaintances, a person with a regular black stripe in life begins to complex and falls into despair.
- Negative self-hypnosis … There is a category of people who initially winds themselves up, looking for errors in their own personal and social life. Even if the closest environment inspires them the opposite, they are not able to soberly assess reality and their place in it.
- Failure in intimacy … Some women after childbirth consider themselves not as attractive as before, and are afraid of losing sexual interest from a loved one. Men, after criticizing their merits from a partner, may acquire an inferiority complex if the size of their genital organ was ridiculed.
- Family problems … Constant scandals and a lack of mutual understanding often lead to the fact that one of the spouses begins to subconsciously blame himself for the events taking place. In the presence of a second half in the form of a tyrant, this factor is aggravated, because the injured party completely loses its own opinion.
- Treason … This negative event can cause serious mental trauma to both men and women. The very idea that a loved one has found a partner on the side with a spectacular appearance and a more solid sexual experience is capable of developing an inferiority complex even in an egocentric person.
- Discrimination … It can occur both by gender and by ethnicity. In some cases, it comes to collective bullying, when the victim begins not only to panic, but makes attempts to commit suicide.
If you do not take into account the complexes about your appearance, then experts have noticed a certain pattern when the percentage of people with a similar problem increases. In this case, we will focus on unemployment and economic decline, which do not give a person the opportunity for career growth and the acquisition of financial well-being.
Manifestations of an inferiority complex in humans
Such symptoms can be both explicit and latent. In most cases, the signs of an inferiority complex are as follows:
- Demonstrativeness … All the behavior of a person who considers himself a flawed person is a silent cry for help. By any means, he wants to attract attention to himself with an obvious fear that his desire will be fulfilled.
- Alertness … If a person has any complexes, then he will see a catch in any word and deed of the people around him. Far-fetched sidelong glances, imaginary whispering behind their backs are real events in the minds of such persons.
- Excessive self-criticism … The principle "attack yourself first" always characterizes people with inferiority complexes. Self-confident subjects rarely engage in such an occupation, because they consider themselves successful individuals in life.
- Lack of belief in perspective … Favorite expressions of an insecure person look like the phrases “I can't”, “it's too difficult for me” and “professionals should deal with this issue”. At the same time, such people not only express their doubts aloud, but in fact do nothing to improve the quality of their own life.
- Diction defects … You should immediately voice the fact that we are not talking about congenital anomalies of the speech apparatus. Stuttering and blurred speech often occur in a person who finds himself in an alarming situation for him when communicating with an emotionally stronger provocateur.
- Superiority complex … Psychologists call this behavior the syndrome of insecure personalities. People with obvious problems in life or persons with a sick psyche try to show their exclusivity. The exception is some children of super-rich parents or oligarchs, for whom it is considered the norm to feel like celestials of this world.
- Neurotic behavior … Sigmund Freud insisted on the fact that guilt is difficult to distinguish from an inferiority complex. The famous psychoanalyst argued that such self-doubt has erotic roots in the development of the problem and further leads to neurosis.
- Mirror dislike … This aspect is especially true for women who consider themselves ugly. Men treat this issue much easier, because they do not consider their appearance to be the main criterion of attractiveness for beautiful ladies.
- Intolerance to compliments … A person who is confident in himself adequately responds to the praise of his actions and appearance. A notorious personality will not perceive a single sign of encouragement in relation to her without a second thought. She will consider this either a manifestation of pity, or an outright mockery of her dignity.
An inferiority complex test
Before thinking about the need to get rid of such a problem (which may not exist), experts recommend answering the following statements and calculating points:
- People do not share my thoughts: in most cases (0), sometimes (3), never (5);
- In someone else's company, I feel very uncomfortable: constantly (5), depending on the company (3), never (0);
- I do not succumb to despondency: yes (5), sometimes (3), never (0);
- To be an optimist is: absurdity (0), important in a difficult period of life (3), a prerequisite (5);
- I want to be as successful as others: yes (0), sometimes (3), I am not worse than others (5);
- I have more disadvantages than advantages: unequivocally (0), the opinion of envious people (3), exactly the opposite (5);
- Every moment in life is beautiful: yes (5), common words (3), no (0);
- I have a feeling of uselessness: often (0), sometimes (3), never (5);
- The motivation for my actions is not clear to people: always (0), sometimes (3), in exceptional cases (5);
- Close people criticize me: constantly (0); by situation (3); very rare (5);
- I have many positive qualities: unambiguously (5); there are negative features (3), they are not (0);
- I realize all my life plans: yes (5); depending on the circumstances (3), it is too difficult (0);
- Everyone is dissatisfied with their appearance: yes (0), this does not apply to me (3), wrong conclusion (5);
- I do not meet the requirements of society: never (5); sometimes (3), always (0);
- I even listen to unfair criticism: yes (0), out of politeness (3), I end the conversation (5).
Results:
- 0-20 points - an indicator of unequivocal complexation with negative self-esteem and obsession with an existing problem;
- 21-40 points - a coefficient that indicates complexes that you can get rid of on your own;
- 41-65 points - problems with self-perception are present, but a person with such an indicator copes well with them.
- 66-75 points - in this case we are talking about a self-confident person, who still should not have an overestimated self-esteem.
Ways to deal with an inferiority complex
There are many techniques that can help you gain self-confidence. Any person can live happily if he wants to change his attitude towards himself.
Independent actions with an inferiority complex
Psychologists have developed a number of effective ways in which to really become a self-respecting person:
- Correct perception of compliments … You should not look for a catch in every praise, which in fact may not be there. If an insincere person says it, it is enough to politely thank him in return and close the topic of conversation.
- Self love … It is necessary not only to learn to accept compliments, but also to make them to your reflection in the mirror. In this case, you should not be afraid to turn into Narcissus, because with an inferiority complex, people of such a plan are not in danger.
- Assessing your actions … In this situation, a notebook of achievements will help, which is recommended to be kept daily. Even the smallest breakthrough in the positive direction must be voiced on paper with a detailed description.
- Refusal of hermitism … Each person is an individual that should not be hidden from the outside world. You should start attending entertainment events where you can give vent to your emotions.
- Conversation with loved ones … If the family supports a person who has developed an inferiority complex, then you can turn to her for help. The message to my family should look like this: describe my positive qualities. Loving people will not say anything that can hurt the soul, so you should take note of their reasoning.
- Refusal to compare … The main mistake of a person with complexes is the desire to try on someone else's image. Becoming a shadow of other people, you should not hope for the emergence of self-respect for your own person. You must always and everywhere be yourself, if this remains within the framework of generally accepted morality.
- Opening up new perspectives … The fear of being ridiculed in the interview must be forgotten once and for all. You should also not listen to the advice of friends who discourage you from trying your hand at a promising profession.
- Sports activities … Some people with an inferiority complex are ashamed of their figure. Therefore, the moment has come when you need to become a visitor to the gym, pool, tennis court and stadium with a treadmill.
- Work on the image … In this case, you can trust both your taste and ask the stylist for help. Nothing changes a person's self-esteem like a change in the positive side of his image.
- Speech work … It is better to say a sweet absurdity than to perplex in conversation word by word. It’s quite easy to be known as a bore, so you don’t need to add another complex to yourself. It is necessary to think about what you are talking about, but not to dwell on each phrase.
- Positive character … People who openly demonstrate their complexes are unlikely to be welcomed in any company or work collective. It is necessary to learn to smile even if you want to fall into despondency.
- Choosing the right friends … Hypocrites and gossips will only exacerbate the depressed state of a person who is not self-confident. You need to communicate with those people who energize and will not criticize without a good reason for their acquaintances.
- Orientation to everything new … You can set yourself a goal to learn 5-10 words from a foreign language or get acquainted with the history and culture of any previously unknown countries. After a certain period of time, a person with this problem will understand that he has become a rather erudite person.
It should be remembered that in some people it was the inferiority complex that caused the desire to achieve everything in life. Successfully overcame all difficulties after attacks from the public such celebrities as Lady Gaga (mockery of her appearance), Christina Aguilera (mockery of the singularity of the future singer), Roman Abramovich and Oprah Winfrey (peer rejection of the poverty of future billionaires).
Help of psychologists with an inferiority complex
Not in all cases, a person is able to independently cope with self-doubt. When looking for an answer to the question of how to deal with an inferiority complex, experts can offer the following methods for eliminating the problem:
- Family therapy … If the reason for the impossibility of self-realization lies in childhood trauma, then its elimination should be carried out together with the parents. Conversation and family coaching are quite effective in this case.
- The "protective shield" method … Not all people are friendly to each other. Treatment of inferiority complexes is primarily based on the correct response to envious people. Psychologists teach to perceive ill-wishers in this way and consider their caustic remarks as bad manners and outright stupidity.
- The method of reification (impersonation) … During communication with their patient, specialists give him the installation for a dialogue with an inanimate object. You can then hone your oratory skills while "discussing" with any household appliance or flower. A great solution for self-doubt would be to talk with your pet.
- Psychological training … The patient is asked to divide a sheet of paper into two equal parts. Then he will need to voice his negative and positive character traits in both halves. During the session, the psychologist voices the problem that he analyzed. After that, a sheet of paper is cut in half to burn or tear the entire written negative into small pieces. Positive reviews about yourself must be placed in the most prominent place in the apartment.
The consequences of an inferiority complex
Some people think it's better to underestimate themselves than to believe in their own perspectives. With such an attitude to the problem, some complications in life may arise:
- Family breakup … If the signs of an inferiority complex are pronounced, then this can jeopardize the existence of a couple in marriage. A person who considers himself a useless person will never become a happy family man in the future.
- Destruction of personality … If the subject does not like his own "I", then you should not expect respect from other people. Self-flagellation and the search for shortcomings in oneself leads to the fact that a person begins to consider the current situation (in the absence of a desire to analyze it) as a normal phenomenon.
- Loneliness … Anyone who doubts his abilities often or violently manifests it or completely withdraws into himself. However, the result is always unambiguous - the loss of friends and acquaintances. If this behavior is additionally accompanied by a superiority complex, then even relatives can lose the trust.
- Suicide … With significant mental trauma, which has created an inferiority complex, the victim of circumstances can solve his problem in a similar way. If there are no close people nearby, then she will fulfill her plans, because people with such a problem are rarely manipulators.
How to deal with an inferiority complex - watch the video:
To figure out how to get rid of an inferiority complex, you first need to believe in yourself. Without this solution, no psychotherapist who is only able to coordinate his patient will help. In some cases, you can do without a visit to a specialist, if the problem you can solve on your own.
