Everyone has their own past. And whoever says anything, it is impossible to forget him completely, even with a strong desire. This is how the brain works, this is the peculiarity of memory. Today we will talk about the past that you want to get out of your head. Memories of the past are what is stored in the bins of memory, pleasant and not very moments that a person periodically visualizes. "All that has passed is the past" - truly wise words of the ancient Roman poet Horace. This is how your memories and experiences should be perceived.
The main reasons for remembering the past
Living with what it was is a thankless task, especially if there are many unpleasant and painful events left. But often a person mentally comes back again and again, each time reliving the difficult moments of his life. Unpleasant constant memories of the past can completely absorb a person, and he begins to get hung up on them, which is fraught with bad consequences and problems with the present.
There are typical situations after which it is very difficult for a person to cope with emotions. He dwells on what happened and transfers negative memories into his future life. Among them:
- Death of a loved one or child … It's really hard to survive such an event. Especially if there were many happy moments shared together, if death took a loved one suddenly.
- Cheating and parting with a loved one … Betrayal can leave a deep wound in the heart, make one turn away from the opposite sex for a long time and stop believing people in principle. The result can be complete loneliness, detachment.
- Lack of demand in the profession … Often, people who could realize their abilities, ambitions, receive decent wages, live with memories of past work, but due to various situations (they were laid off, the company went bankrupt) were left without a favorite place.
- Moving to another city for permanent residence … Homesickness, even if life was much harder there, is characteristic of every immigrant. It is expressed rather not in memories of the past place of residence, but of the people who stayed there, favorite places of rest.
- Everyday routine at home and at work … Lack of emotions, sadness, depression from the change of seasons - all this makes you come back again and again to the memories of cheerful companies, warm weather, etc.
There are really serious reasons, such as the irrevocable loss of loved ones or a divorce, which can postpone an imprint on the entire future life of a person, even a strong spirit. And there are those that only too emotional, weak-willed or soft-hearted people cannot cope with.
Whatever the reason for remembering the past, if a person constantly thinks about it, reproaches and blames himself for what happened, or for what he did not do, mentally turns events and thinks, and what would have happened if then he acted differently, he definitely needs to urgently get rid of obsessive thoughts. This is the wrong way to heal the soul. A person who constantly looks back to the past is doomed to further failures. As the famous German writer of the twentieth century, Erich Maria Remarque, said, “someone who looks back too often can easily stumble and fall”.
How to get rid of memories of the past
Our life is not all about troubles. Everyone has bright and joyful moments, when remembered, the soul comes to life and sings. And instead of thinking about the good more often, many people are ready to suffer for the rest of their lives, regret the unrealizable, harbor pain and resentment, worry about past failures and disappointments. They do not even understand that it could be otherwise, and continue to inflict irreparable harm on themselves and their loved ones, refusing to forget past memories. In order to clear your memory, you first need to calmly understand the reasons, separate the events that should be deleted from your life, or accept them, leaving tender and warm moments in your memory, and turn them in your favor.
Analyzing memories of the past
In order for the events of the past tense to cease to haunt a person, it is necessary to figure out at what moment and why these thoughts began to disturb and occupy most of his consciousness. At this stage, it is important:
- Forgive and let go … It often happens that, having experienced certain setbacks, a person constantly replays them, reinsuring himself against new disappointments. He mistakenly thinks that he will be ready for a situation when the same failures will be repeated in his life, and does not understand that, on the contrary, only attracts them to himself.
- Admit your guilt … You need to understand that everything that happens to a person partially happens because of his actions. It is very important to realize this, since it is easiest to blame anyone for all sins, but not yourself. This approach will make it possible to quickly draw the right conclusions: if he himself is to blame for what happened, by actions or thoughts, he attracted negative to himself, then it is easier to get out of such a situation and change everything.
- Forget mistakes … It often happens that a person reproaches himself all his life for having done a bad thing to another, causing him a lot of trouble, pain and tears. Most likely, he really acted disgustingly, for which he should be ashamed. But this does not mean at all that because of this you need to endlessly torment yourself, poisoning your life not only for yourself, but also for your loved ones. The very fact of realizing a bad deed is important.
Careful analysis and sincere repentance will allow you to quickly forgive yourself and turn this page.
Learning from memories of the past
Everything that happened to us in the past, good or bad, should not just disappear without a trace. Even if a person's life is beautiful, you should not relax, since everything can change in one moment. As for unpleasant situations, then from them, even more so, you must always learn lessons. Firstly, so that they do not recur in the future, and secondly, so that in the future it does not torment the question of how to get rid of negative memories of the past.
The past should be an invaluable experience for everyone. And if a person learns to use it competently, so as not to make or repeat mistakes, then he will be able to live enjoying the present and look confidently into the future. But, unfortunately, there are not so many such people. The rest continue to step on the same rake, which leads them to the next life ups and downs, which return to them in unpleasant and unwanted memories.
Release from negative thoughts about the past
First of all, in order to stop living with memories, you need to have a great desire and perception that this cannot continue this way.
Daily practice exercises and meditation will help you free yourself from intrusive memories:
- Choose the right attitude … Every morning you need to start by listing everything that is positive and dear to your heart today.
- Do a psychological trick with water … If unpleasant thoughts and memories creep into your head, you need to turn on the water tap and imagine how all the negativity flows into the sink along with the water.
- Get rid of things related to the past … If you are pestering with resentment and anger at a former loved one who you broke up with, you need to remove his phone number from your mobile phone, remove it or throw away his photos, gifts and things. It is better to destroy them, at the same time freeing themselves from his invisible presence, or at least hide them away or give them to strangers.
- Change anything about your surroundings and habits … Another good way to forget about the bad is to do something useful (clean up the house, buy new furniture or start repairs), change the environment (go to a fitness club, make new acquaintances), transform your appearance (cut your hair or dye your hair in a different color) and finally change the job.
- Master meditation … This will help you learn how to relax your body and brain, calm your nervous system, and concentrate your attention only on important and pleasant things.
- Take the lessons of fate … In order to let go of grievances and forgive offenders, you need to learn to be grateful for what you have. After analyzing all the events that happened in the past, you can find positive moments in them. For example, how they contributed to creative development or the formation of oneself as a person.
Many people don't know how to get rid of past memories. Giving one or another advice, it is necessary to direct their thoughts and actions on the right path. It is a mistake to think that forgiveness is approval of bad deeds. Rather, it is getting rid of anger, anger, hatred, desire for revenge, etc.
As you can see, nothing special is required from a person. But still, there is one important condition - you need to drop laziness, since laziness and stupidity are our two worst enemies. It is worth getting rid of them first of all, otherwise nothing will change for the better in life.
Introducing meditation to get rid of memories of the past
Meditation is the art of relaxation through concentration. Don't be scared. The initial practice is fairly simple and involves focusing on sounds. Since many people understand information better by ear, this method is very effective.
With the help of certain mantras, which are not difficult to find on the Internet, or meaningful phrases, you can protect yourself from negative thoughts. It is not bad when a person independently comes up with phrases for meditation for his personal memories and phobias from the past, from which he wants to get rid of.
These should be short and specific phrases, for example:
- I let go of my past … Repeating the phrase several times will make it easier to deal with the memories. It also acts as self-hypnosis.
- I am free from unpleasant memories, I am in control of my thoughts … This is the second step of cleansing. This is the only way to tune oneself, to open up to the outside world.
- I easily part with painful memories, I forgive myself for mistakes in a past life … Yes, it is painful and difficult. But the past cannot be brought back and changed. So it's better to accept it as it is, to let it go and not to allow repetition in the future.
- I sincerely thank the past for the lessons and life experiences … Sometimes believers say that God will not give trials that a person cannot endure. Since this was destined to happen, there is nothing to be done. But you need to find strength and survive the events.
- I only live in the present … Such a simple mantra teaches you to perceive reality, notice those around you, events that only happen, helps to break out of the abyss of sad memories.
- I love myself, my loved ones and all people … Yes exactly. Even if someone has done a lot of pain, you should forgive him. And also live with the belief that this will not happen again.
Mantras need to be repeated not only when unpleasant memories roll in, but at any free moment. You can do this at home in peace and quiet, or you can do it on the way to work in public transport or in your car, standing in line or waiting for a phone call. At the same time, the psychological attitude of a person is of no small importance. And if he recites the formulas of healing from the bottom of his heart, this can be the starting point for a new life without unpleasant memories of the past.
I would like to once again emphasize the well-known truth about the materiality of thoughts. Therefore, you need to repeat verbal phrases slowly, thoughtfully, many times and until you begin to feel favorable changes in your consciousness. Relief may not come immediately, so do not be upset ahead of time. Positive thoughts will surely begin to fill the brain, gradually displacing disturbing memories from consciousness.
The main thing in meditation is to learn to concentrate your attention on the spoken words. At first, a person's mind may be distracted by other thoughts. Therefore, you need to return your consciousness to the repetition of a mantra or a meaningful phrase, trying to keep your attention on them as long as possible.
Why can't I let go of memories of the past?
Unfortunately, it also happens. It seems that a person understands everything, sincerely wants to change something in his life, tries to forbid himself to think about what has long passed, takes some steps for this, but he succeeds. Some unknown inner force holds on to these memories of the past and does not let them go.
There may be several options here. Either the person is cheating with himself, or the problem really sits so deeply that he cannot get rid of it on his own. Then you need to contact a psychologist who will help you not only understand yourself, your feelings for past events and people, past grievances and failures, but also provide qualified psychological help, sorting out all the memories on the shelves: pleasant - closer, and tormenting the soul - away, into the bins.
Letting go of the past is very difficult, but possible. You need to constantly work on yourself in order to learn to forgive yourself and others, let go of people with whom you have unhealthy relationships, get rid of bad habits and constant feelings of guilt, not regret what did not work out, not come up with unrealizable desires. And those who managed to overcome their thoughts and experiences, to turn weaknesses into strengths, very much regret that they did not do this earlier. After all, that inner freedom, healing power, peace of mind and happiness that they felt and acquired are incomparable with anything.
For some, an ordinary frank conversation will be enough, for someone you need to apply special techniques, and in especially difficult cases - to conduct long trainings. The sooner a person realizes that he needs the help of a specialist, the faster he can recover from his "sick" thoughts, and the problem of how not to live by past memories will go into oblivion.
How to get rid of memories of the past - watch the video:
The past should remain in the past and be only an invaluable source of life experience. To stop living with memories of what is already irrevocably gone, you need to start living in the present. One has only to discard laziness!
