Love for an unfree partner and the reasons for the emergence of a secret connection. The article will give advice on a plan of action in a situation that has arisen and ways to recover from the destruction of the emerged life triangle. Love for a married man is a situation that is very often condemned by the public. If you do not take this factor as a basis, then the likelihood of literally every woman getting into it should be noted. Therefore, without hypocrisy or excessive reasoning about morality, it is necessary to figure out how to behave a lady in this delicate twists and turns.
Reasons for the connection with a married man
Love usually comes unwittingly when you don't expect it at all. However, this is not always one hundred percent dogma when flirting with an unfree partner occurs. At the same time, the following factors can become the impetus for starting a secret affair:
- Mutual sympathy … A married man and an unmarried woman may well like each other. Acquaintance usually occurs through mutual acquaintances, but the intervention of the will of chance is not excluded. Very often, such a love triangle arises from the connection between colleagues, because even in the workplace, the exchange of fluids between potential partners is possible.
- Feeling lonely … In this case, the words of a famous song are immediately remembered that there are usually nine guys for ten girls. Sometimes even clever and beautiful women while away long evenings alone, because they cannot find their soul mate. As a result, they can have an exciting romance with an unfree man.
- Situation "the train has left" … Someone at one time was too picky in the choice of a partner, so in the end he was left with a broken trough. With the onset of epiphany, some of the fair sex understand that all the standing men were simply "dismantled". To create further relationships, either drunken persons or outright misogynists remained.
- Revenge … There are many reasons for looking for a non-free victim. First, a woman in the past could herself have encountered a predator who stole her husband from her. Secondly, a lady is capable of starting an affair with a partner of her acquaintance out of a sense of revenge, if she is superior to her in some way and frankly demonstrates this.
- The desire for easy money … Relationship with a married man is not always based on mutual passion on both sides. Some greedy people are ready to go to any lengths to steal a wealthy spouse from their wife. At the same time, they act toughly, paying little attention to public opinion and moral principles.
- For the sake of boredom … Even such an absurd reason sometimes pushes women to have a relationship with a ringed man. These anemones, yearning in idle idleness, can start such an affair just for a variety of their leisure time. They cannot live without thrills, so the forbidden fruit will definitely attract them.
- Collecting men … If to be objective in the voiced question, then this type of hunters is very unsympathetic in moral terms. They set nets and snares mainly on non-free gentlemen, in order to then put another tick in their "track record".
- Unwillingness for a serious relationship … There is a category of ladies who does not at all seek to tie the knot. The creation of a family is not included in their plans, so they bypass even the enviable bachelors. Such women are quite satisfied with an affair with an unfree lover, because such a relationship does not imply obligations and oaths of allegiance.
- Having your own family … In this situation, a so-called quadrangle is created, which can exist for quite a long time. A woman who is a homeless person in such a relationship does not at all try to take the gentleman away from her legal wife. She can love her secret boyfriend, but with her husband she can feel stability and security.
In most cases, an affair with a married person has nothing to do with real love. However, even the mercantile goals of starting a relationship can be transformed into a feeling of falling in love with the ringed partner. In this situation, it is worth thinking not about the reasons why it happened, but looking for the correct model of behavior in a difficult life story.
Rules of conduct for a woman in a relationship with a married man
Every lady should figure out what she wants from a relationship with an unfree lover. If a woman is really inflamed with passion and her goal is a relationship without noise and a showdown on the part of the spouse of the secret chosen one, then she needs to act as follows:
- Maximum conspiracy … In order not to cause problems for a man dear to his heart, it is necessary to carefully hide the relationship that has arisen. At the same time, it is forbidden to talk about him even in a laudatory form with friends. Very often, gossip spreads at the speed of sound, becoming information for everyone to use. Ideally, you need to create your own secret connection for calls to a married partner, so that the spouse does not make a grandiose scandal after the audit in his phone.
- Minimum intrusiveness … It is not necessary to red-hot the means for negotiations with numerous SMS and declarations of love. The unfree gentleman will be scared off by this, because he may not be ready for such violent manifestations of feelings on the part of an ardent fan. It is also not an option to watch him in all conceivable and inconceivable places, because the lover's wife can also be engaged in the same exciting occupation.
- Denial of jealousy … The ringed Don Juan is not the personal property of even the legal wife. He is a free person with a stamp in his passport, which sometimes stops few people from going to the left. You should get used to the idea that your beloved officially belongs to another woman, who definitely has more rights to him.
- Self respect … If a lady does not value herself, then none of her entourage will do this. Even the role of a mistress should not be humiliating, making a person blinded by passion into an errand woman. Demonstrating your feelings to a non-free gentleman must be correct, but sufficiently firmly letting him know about your solvency as a person.
If a woman behaves as it was announced, then she will not even have a question of how to win the love of a married man. The only exception will be the case if the womanizer sees in his secret partner exclusively an object for sexual pleasures. At the same time, not a single earthly force will force him to leave his legal spouse and go to his mistress.
How to break up with a married man
Sometimes a lady begins to understand that she is seriously in love, but she has no chance of creating a full-fledged family with an unfree partner. In this case, she will be helped by the advice of psychologists on how to deal with love for a married man:
- Organization of "debriefing" … If you do not have the strength to take the first step into a new life without an unfree gentleman, then you can shift this responsibility onto him. It is enough to arrange for him several grandiose scandals with all the ensuing consequences. At the same time, it is necessary to accuse him of all mortal sins that he has committed or is about to carry out. A little more imagination in this regard, and the gentleman will rush off at the speed of sound to his wife, whom he did not even think of leaving.
- Straight Talk … Seeing obvious consumerism on the part of her lover, a lady can call him into a heart-to-heart conversation. The question of how to get rid of love for a married person will disappear as unnecessary by itself with a clear arrangement of all dots above the "Y". A person who is not going to leave his family does not need difficulties on the side. Therefore, it will not be difficult for an intelligent woman to pull off the mask of hypocrisy.
- Copy spouse … This is a very effective way if the lover had a habit of complaining about his soul mate. Lovelaces and lovers of pleasures on the side want exceptionally ease from extramarital affairs, so they will not tolerate the slightest pressure on them. To cut off all the ends, it is necessary from a woman of mystery to turn into a fury-saw who wants to know about every step of her lover.
- Insisting on starting a family … Usually a lover does not want anything serious, especially to have children from a passion. If a woman actively talks about her plans to have offspring, build a house and create a new family nest, then the lover will be forced to retire, because this is not at all part of his plans.
Of course, there is still a small chance that a man will want to leave the family and create a new one, but it is small. And as the people say, it is difficult to build your happiness on someone else's misfortune. A new family can be subject to serious condemnation from friends, as well as hatred of children from the ex-spouse. This can introduce some contention and problems. In addition, being secret lovers, unencumbered by serious household and financial problems, is one thing. But to become lawful spouses, to live under one roof, is quite another.
Important! In this case, all is fair if the time has come to end secret meetings. However, you should not tell the cheater's soulmate about his unscrupulous behavior towards her. Someone else's destroyed family can amuse the wounded pride of an offended person, but such actions will not bring peace and happiness to the avenger.
Ways to deal with depression after a breakup
After parting, many women who have managed to seriously fall in love with their ringed boyfriend fall into a state of despondency and melancholy. If the past relationship was initially doomed to failure, then work should be started on the return of inner peace.
Anti-Balance Tips
In order not to get rid of your pernicious passion never, it is necessary to take the following measures to acquire additional and lingering suffering:
- Making yourself an idol … Ideally, you need to place a photo of your former love in a prominent place, where he smiles cheerfully and looks like a completely happy person. To then pour salt on the wound, you can immediately place a joint picture with the former gentleman in the happiest period of the relationship with him. It is worth hoisting all the gifts of a lover in a prominent place in order to periodically remember for what reason they were presented.
- Looking for a double … So that the wounds of the soul do not heal as long as possible, it is necessary to begin an active search for a married man who is very similar to a former lover. Then it is necessary to hastily organize the resulting relationship clearly in the same way as the previous spy games. Amateur performance in this case is not encouraged, because everything should be done clearly with a carbon copy.
- Historical walks … At the same time, we are not talking about a protected area at all, but about those streets and squares where secret meetings with a once loved one took place. You need to spend all your free time there, trying to avoid visiting entertainment venues and recreational activities.
- Operation Intercept … At the same time, one must act decisively, not being afraid to seem an annoying intriguer. In order for a former lover to always stand in the mind's eye of a broken-hearted woman, it is necessary to constantly contemplate him in real life. To achieve success, it is recommended to turn into a hound, which always correctly takes the trail of an unfree gentleman.
Note! All suggested anti-advice is very often the most common mistakes women who broke up with a married man. If the relationship has no future (which in most cases happens in a love triangle), then it is urgent to end them. Then you should avoid the voiced "recommendations" so as not to aggravate your mental anguish.
How to behave correctly
If the lover's feelings for her gentleman were serious, then it will be difficult for her to painlessly get rid of them.
Psychologists have developed a number of recommendations on how to experience love for a married person:
- Departure into oblivion … Such advice should not be taken literally, but for a former secret friend, it is necessary to become invisible once and for all. Repeated "friendly" meetings will not lead to anything good, because in the end they may end with the renewal of communication without prospects. All possible channels of communication with the past should be cut off, changing the phone number if necessary. A grief admirer who did not take his mistress seriously will quickly leave her alone and lead a new passion on the side.
- Change of job … Such categorical actions should be taken if the married gentleman is an employee of the same institution where his former passion works. The situation becomes especially complicated when the boss becomes a partner in secret meetings. In this case, it will be very problematic to maintain business relationships that will not go beyond flirting.
- Getting rid of illusions … A woman who interferes in other people's family relationships should initially understand her place in the created love triangle. Even if she becomes an outlet and an island of tranquility for a married man, this does not at all mean her leadership in the competition with her legal wife. After breaking the secret connection, it is necessary to soberly assess this fact, focusing on what could not have happened otherwise.
- New acquaintances … This advice does not at all mean the beginning of an active search for another lover. On emotions, you can step on the same rake, while aggravating the situation to a critical state. Out of revenge, it is also not recommended to trump a former unfree gentleman with a new relationship. Such actions will look ridiculous, which will only cause bewilderment among those close to you. However, starting an innocent flirtation or just companionship with pleasant men still does not hurt.
- Work on yourself … Sitting and grieving about the past is the lot of weak people. A self-sufficient woman can also find herself in the humiliating role of a mistress, but she will have enough strength to get out of the vicious circle after realizing her place in the life of an unfree gentleman. After breaking up with him, you need to devote free time to further realizing yourself as a person. At the same time, self-esteem will rise, which definitely suffered after a love story far from romance.
How to get rid of love for a married man - watch the video:
A relationship with a married man is the choice of any free woman, because she has the right to control her life herself. However, statistics say that in very rare cases, such a relationship ends with a happy ending. Is it worth wasting your precious time with a ringed lover when there are so many interesting bachelors around!