Quarrel with a loved one and analysis of the reasons for its occurrence. The article will give recommendations to men and women on how to resolve the conflict between loving hearts. Reconciliation after a quarrel is an important moment when a disagreement has arisen in a couple, which requires an immediate resolution of the resulting problem. Delay in this case can lead to a complete cessation of communication, even in people with a solid relationship experience.
Timeframe for a truce in a quarrel with a loved one
Immediately after an argument, you don't always need to run and put up. The intensity of passions has not yet cooled down, feelings are overwhelming. In some cases, it is necessary to maintain a certain pause so that the offended party does not utter even more wrong words under the influence of emotions. Psychologists say that such a break depends on the following factors:
- Quarrel "misunderstanding" … In this case, one cannot wait a second, because the obvious absurdity can develop into a more serious problem. It is necessary to sort out the critical situation right on the spot before it is presented in a different light by the envious couple of lovers.
- Conflict of interest … With the resulting discomfort in the relationship, you need to wait at least a day in order to clearly understand for yourself the mutual claims to each other. Having built in your mind a plan for the upcoming conversation, you can safely apply it in practice a day after the contention that has arisen.
- Quarrel over jealousy … In this case, passions can flare up with such force that communication between the two partners must be temporarily stopped. Psychologists say that a couple of days is enough for the two halves who quarreled over this to become one again.
- Conflict after betrayal of a partner … In such a situation, everything is very individual, because each person reacts differently to such a betrayal. Someone can make contact with a cheater in a week, and some people forever delete him from their lives.
- Quarrel over the cruelty of the chosen one … Experts do not get tired of repeating the truism that it makes no sense to endure and forgive like this. The one who struck once rarely does not repeat his "feat" a second time after forgiving his inappropriate behavior towards his partner.
In most situations, it is necessary to pause during a quarrel with a loved one in order to cool down the intensity of passions. However, each case of relationship between partners is individual, so you should coordinate your actions based on the couple's own experience of communication. For example, for some, quarrels become just an excuse to reconcile in bed for a moment.
Ways to reconcile the two parties after a quarrel
When deciding to smooth out the conflict and reunite with your soul mate, it is necessary to provide for the fact that women and men react differently to attempts to get closer to them after a quarrel.
Tips for women to reconcile with a partner
In most cases, it is the fair sex that goes first to resolve the conflict. Psychologists recommend that ladies solve the problems that have arisen in the following way:
- Wisdom … A frank play on the feelings of a beloved man will not lead to anything good in the end. Repeated accusations will only aggravate the situation, which may end in the couple's separation. It is necessary to frankly tell your chosen one about your claims in such a way as not to infringe on his manhood.
- Seduction element … To interest in an intimate plan of your partner will not prevent any woman who is in a quarrel with him. In some couples, a conflict is artificially provoked in order to diversify their relationship. Sex therapists claim that at the height of the next scandal, a woman can bring it to nothing if she uses her charms.
- Holding a pause … Representatives of the fair sex often, in a fit of righteous anger, throw out a large amount of accumulated negativity on their partner. Psychologists recommend taking a walk in the park or visiting a store after another quarrel with the chosen one. After the voiced emotional respite, you can return to the conversation no longer in a raised voice.
- Innocent flirting … No man who appreciates his woman will not tolerate attacks in her direction from competitors. Even after the most stormy showdown, he will observe the life of his woman with increased attention. If you take advantage of this factor and cause a loved one to be jealous, then he will quickly try to restore his position on the love front.
- Change of image … First of all, this must be done for oneself, so that the effect of the manipulations performed with one's appearance reaches the maximum effect. A woman who falls in love with her reflection in the mirror will be able to make peace with her partner in a fairly short period of time due to the interest aroused in herself.
- Respect for your partner's hobbies … Some conflicts in a couple occur due to a different concept of shared leisure. When figuring out how to put up after a quarrel, you need to read the relevant literature about the hobby of your beloved man. With a frank conversation with him, you can show off knowledge in this area, which will definitely help the couple to reunite.
Any woman should remember that any of her wrong actions can trigger the mechanism of so-called "evil tongues" in the form of gossip. Therefore, when deciding to make peace with your chosen one, you must carefully evaluate the plan for your further actions in order to reunite with your loved one and not spoil your own reputation.
Recommendations for men to make peace with a partner
Representatives of the stronger sex like to go ahead, which in this case is not the right solution to the problem. Looking for options on how to put up properly after a quarrel, experts advise using the following measures to influence the heart of the chosen one:
- Maximum tact … A woman, as you know, loves with her ears. This factor has a double effect when it comes to the lady in love with the abuser. A guilty boyfriend can earn forgiveness through a correct explanation of his act, which hurt his soul mate.
- Help in household matters … If a couple lives together, then you can surprise your beloved woman with a general cleaning of the home or buying a thing for the family. Each lady will appreciate such efforts, which will indicate the partner's attention to their common life.
- Nice present … Some women often save on themselves if they want to purchase some item of interest to them. In a quarrel, it's time for a man to fork out in order to present his beloved with the thing that she dreamed of, along with confessions of his guilt.
- Use of Internet resources … Not a single lady will remain indifferent if, after the conflict, her man begins to write her gentle SMS-ki. It will also not prevent him from showing his activity on social networks that his beloved visits.
- Help of your beloved friends … If mutual acquaintances are positively disposed towards the quarreling couple, then their support will be simply invaluable. It is necessary to honestly tell them about the problem that has arisen (leaving out intimate details) so that they contribute to the reconciliation of the two sides.
- Romantics … Every woman loves to be beautifully looked after. A bouquet of your favorite flowers, dinner in a cafe or restaurant and a short trip to a beautiful area are the main components of the program for a man who wants to make peace with his beloved. Well-proven boat rides, where an offended woman can not only listen to an apology from her man, but also internally relax under the light sound of a wave.
- Using bigboards … Recently, it has become a fashionable trend to express your feelings in this way. If an offended lady sees a huge billboard with her image and a declaration of love from a guilty gentleman, then the ice in her heart will definitely melt.
- Recording on asphalt … In the absence of the financial ability to arrange a billboard for your soul mate, you can resort to standard, but no less effective methods. If the quarrel was not due to the betrayal of a partner, then any woman will smile when she sees the traces on the asphalt from her lover.
- Elimination of annoying factors … In this case, we will talk about banal jealousy, which often destroys even the strongest relationships. If a woman dear to her heart is pissed off by the friendship of her beloved with a former classmate or colleague, then a man should think about priorities in this matter. Or try to introduce and make friends women with each other.
- Travel … If it is possible to carry out this event, it is necessary to take advantage of the available chance. A change of scenery quite often helps a couple to find mutual understanding in the conflict phase. However, a man must organize everything in such a way that for the lady of his heart a trip to exotic places becomes a pleasant and unexpected surprise.
How to avoid quarrels between lovers
Any conflict can be prevented with a competent approach to the problem. To avoid a tense relationship in a couple, you must adhere to the following action plan:
- Refusal of pressure on the person … Some subjects consider their point of view to be the only correct version for studying their life experience. However, when a love relationship occurs, such a formulation sometimes works exclusively according to the relationship scheme in the form of "tyrant - victim". As a result, a conflict arises, which then goes beyond a simple misunderstanding. If you want to maintain a relationship, you need to learn to respect each other.
- Rejection of stereotypes … There is an opinion that people who are extremely different in temperament connect their hearts to create relationships (plus stretches to minus). Such an assumption does not correspond to the truth, therefore, in order to preserve the relationship, you should somewhat reduce your ambitions.
- "Lapping" to the partner … In rare cases, a choleric person will find common interests with a phlegmatic person. Emotionally active people will most of all enjoy skydiving or exploring mountain peaks. Calmer natures will be horrified by the proposed similar prospects, which can lead to a quarrel in the couple. However, although love prefers equals, for the sake of serious feelings it is worth reckoning with the preferences of your soulmate.
- Control over jealousy … In this case, psychologists like to quote W. Shakespeare, who called her "the monster with green eyes." Insecure people and outspoken owners quite often conflict with their soulmate because of the seeming betrayal on her part. The advice of psychologists in this case says that you need to believe in yourself and your chosen one.
- Analysis of misunderstandings … It is this situation that is capable of destroying a couple that could not resolve the situation in hot pursuit. The factor "someone said wrong, and someone heard wrong" is one of the reasons for the emergence of a stone wall between loving hearts. It is better to make it a rule to stop and have a heart-to-heart talk before the conflict.
- Controlling your words … Very often jokes or simply ill-mannered persons sin this. Any criticism of a woman's appearance is perceived by her very painfully. Not every man calmly listens to a derogatory verdict regarding his solvency as a representative of the stronger sex. In order not to think about how to avoid quarrels, it is worth controlling your words and thoughts.
- Defying libel … Some people are haunted by the observation of other people's happiness. Envious couples can be both friends of a woman and friends of a man. This is especially dangerous for the relationship of the beloved, when detractors from both sides join forces. There is only one way out - to learn to trust each other.
- Destruction of old accounts … If the partners have already gone through the reconciliation phase more than once, then it is possible that they have not forgotten past grievances. At the slightest similar situation, the conflict can flare up with renewed vigor, which ends with a long quarrel between lovers. In this case, there is a wonderful saying "Whoever remembers the old - he will be out of sight." The past should be left in the past, and not drag it with luggage through the whole life.
- Loyalty to a partner … Frank flirting works very well if a man or woman is looking for a soul mate for a fulfilling relationship. However, already in an established couple, the search for a new partner due to boredom may end in the separation of the beloved forever. If there is a reason to look for and choose a new chosen one, then it is better to immediately part with a person who does not suit you.
- Family conflict resolution … The problem of such a plan will never arise if both partners are orphans and without any immediate family members. Otherwise, the family may not like the choice of their loved one, so they begin to criticize a person that they did not like. The solution is to keep communication to a minimum, talk more often about the positive qualities of a loved one and, ideally, live separately.
- Prohibition on the division of power … In any pair, someone is trying to dominate the relationship. Psychologists say that people of equal rights become friends rather than lovers. Therefore, finding out who is the boss in the house can lead to a quarrel between partners. It is important here to be flexible, be able to give in or correctly defend your opinion without becoming personal.
- Rejection of dogmas when raising children … If the spouses already have a child, then the fact is not excluded that it is because of him that a conflict between the lovers will begin. Someone wants to raise children according to the Makarenko system, and someone likes Craig's recommendations. The main among the methods of the approach is unity. You need to look for a "middle ground" and justifiably defend your ideas.
- Compliance with ethical standards … The betrayal of a loved one can be both moral and physical. In both cases, this is a serious reason not only for a quarrel, but also for a complete break in relations. If there is no goal to maintain communication, then there is no problem. If a couple wants to be together, then only loyalty, support and love are ways to work wonders in the event of disagreements.
How to put up properly after a quarrel - look at the video:
Reconciliation after a quarrel with a loved one is an art that both sides of the conflict must possess. Only in this case can a couple claim to have a long existence in the format of the relationship that has arisen. A frank discussion of the problem, the ability to ask for forgiveness and forgiveness - these are the golden dogmas on which you can build a happy family.
