Why is it all going well for some, while others break up? Only one question arises: why did everything turn out so sad? Each of the divorced believes that the fault lies with his partner, but this is far from the case. You need to be honest with at least yourself and answer yourself: what did I do wrong, what exactly was MY mistake? Why did a loved one leave the family? What caused the betrayal, loneliness and depression that arose? Below are the most common reasons why people can no longer be together and decide to divorce as a means of overcoming accumulated problems:
1. Adultery
Perhaps this reason pushes many to decide to leave, especially when it comes to her husband's infidelities. There is no compromise here: only an irrevocable goodbye. Perhaps, if the spouses found the slightest reason to save the family, to cling to this "straw" of saving their ship of life, then the family would not fall apart.
2
In addition to the very fact of adultery, this should include constant fits of jealousy … Both men and women are beginning to make claims to each other about "looking to the left." Perhaps there will be no fact of betrayal, and jealousy leads to frequent quarrels and mutual reproaches, which push the irritated psyche of one of the spouses to the decision to divorce.
3. Dissatisfaction in the material plane
This applies to those families who have a problem with the housing issue. As a rule, one of the spouses does not like to live with their parents and wants to leave to live separately. But the husband or wife does not want this at all. He wants to live with his parents, "he feels good there." They do not have enough funds to buy their own apartment, and a rented apartment is also not the best option. Men, as a rule, begin to worry about the inability to provide their families with housing, and women continue to insist on living together with their parents.
Regarding the separation (without parents), I would like to note here that one of the spouses wants to feel like a more independent "owner" in his own apartment, albeit a rented one. He does not want to live with his wife's parents. And then a dilemma arises: either go live with me, or stay with your parents. It also happens that a family lives with the husband's parents, it seems, what could be better? The husband is happy, "his native walls", but even here a problem arises - the mother-in-law begins to interfere with the quiet family life. This is the next point. 4. Interference in the family life of the parents. Why does such enmity arise between the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law? And most importantly: how did it happen that this became the reason for the divorce? We have already written about this very enmity and hatred in the article "Why don't the daughter-in-law and mother-in-law love each other?" Out of herself from the accumulated anger and resentment against her mother-in-law and her husband, who cannot resolve the situation, the daughter-in-law gives her husband an ultimatum: “either we move or live with your mother”. Any son will protect his mother. Another thing is that women should be wiser and learn to live and coexist in the same apartment. But this often does not happen. Not because of not knowing how to do it, but because of unwillingness to do it. The accumulating irritation gradually develops into mutual reproaches, accusations and insults of the spouses against each other. As a result, they begin to live separately and later get divorced.
5. Weak willpower
one of the spouses, which implies his alcoholism, drug addiction, gambling addiction and other painful addictions. Sometimes women struggle with their husband's alcoholism with all their might, because if you love a person, you want to pull him out of the abyss. Years go by, and there have been no results. The husband begins to take everything out of the house, sell and spend money on the "green serpent". Coming home drunk, he begins to turn everything around, as a rule, beatings are very frequent in such families, the children are left to themselves, and the wife is no longer able to endure all this, she decides to go for a divorce. Such a decision is given to her with difficulty, because she once decided not to give up, but since there is no way out and her husband does not want to change, then her hands give up and she decides to leave.
It happens and happens the other way around, when the wife drinks alcohol or becomes addicted to something. What dependence can there be? Anything, but definitely falling into the question of preserving the family, so that home and family are in the first place for her.
6
The spouses do not experience their former passion, they " tired of each other". They stop noticing each other, ignore each other, each lives in his own "veiled" world. Intimate relationships also cease to exist between them. The question arises: why did this happen? Perhaps the husband is to blame, who does not see anything but his friends and constant parties, does not work or has fallen under the influence of bad people? Or maybe he does not want to return home, because, in his opinion, there are only problems at home? Perhaps he stopped loving his wife, she no longer interests him. If only you could change everything, but how? If it concerns women, we advise you to read the article "How to remain the most unique for a man or a memo for all women." But you can't blame everything on women! Still, the last word and decision should be made by a man who gradually "leaves" the family in search of something new, where he thinks that he will be better.
Still, people can get divorced for other reasons. But, most likely, these will no longer be reasons, but reasons that will become the last straw for the decision to divorce. Because of such reasons, perhaps, it was not worth leaving. The reason lies in our ability or inability to live with our spouse. And both spouses must work on this.
