The alcoholic husband and the possible prospect of life with him. The article will focus on how to keep a family with a drinking spouse, whose feelings have not cooled down. Also, recommendations will be given to a woman to refuse to live with a drunkard in the most critical circumstances. The alcoholic husband is a tragedy for the whole family, because such addiction often deforms the human personality. The most terrible in this situation is the option when children are in a dysfunctional family. It is worth understanding such a family tragedy, as well as considering methods of dealing with a chronic illness.
Types of alcohol addicted men
It is immediately worth noting the fact that alcoholics are rarely born even with the most unfavorable hereditary factors. Very often, it is the man's own weakness that then leads to an addiction to the constant use of intoxicating drinks.
When dealing with alcoholic husbands, one should distinguish between the type of their behavior, which psychologists have characterized as follows:
- Neurasthenic alcoholic … Such persons are constantly emotionally overexcited, which makes them want additional relaxation. All this leads to the excessive use of intoxicating drinks, which over time turns into a fairly well-established norm. “I am not an alcoholic, but just got nervous” is the motto of such individuals. In the most deplorable situations, people of the sounded type begin to show aggression towards the environment and family members.
- Alcoholic conformist … One of the most interesting varieties of men who like to "collar". They are satisfied with everything for the simple reason that such individuals really do not bother anything in this world. They are just opportunists, for whom a glass of vodka on the table is not a favorite hit from Grigory Leps, but an important component of the daily menu. They deliver a minimum of inconvenience to those around them regarding the absence of aggressive behavior, which is characteristic of neurasthenics. However, not every wife will tolerate the conformist alcoholic behavior pattern, which can be very uncomfortable for all family members.
- Lone alcoholic … Each man can react differently to the situation, but being alone always and everywhere is a pathological condition. Someone adapts to this, starting to endlessly change partners. However, not everyone likes this way of life, so the process of systematic self-pity begins and the final instance is the binge. Eduard Asadov clearly said that there are many people with whom you can really go to bed, but only a few of those with whom you want to wake up. For women with established moral principles, this kind of alcoholic man cannot be dangerous. Few people decide to start a family with such representatives of the by no means a stronger sex, if the lady is not a masochist.
- Alcoholism at the company pet … A husband who radiates charm and amazes others with caustic anecdotes under the fifth glass of vodka is a permissible phenomenon. We are all human, we are all human, so there is no point in condemning such behavior. The situation is worse when the described factor becomes a habit, making a joker out of a banal alcoholic. The main thing is that over time, a kind-hearted person does not become aggressive towards his family under the influence of intoxicating vapors.
Psychologists consider the type of alcoholic-neurasthenic to be the most dangerous for a woman in marriage, which is not always true. The whole point is that an addiction to a green snake, even from a calm person, can make a monster that will become dangerous to society.
The consequences of living with alcoholic husbands
We all designate our future, based on the experience of previous relationships and our own intuition. However, the question of how to live with an alcoholic husband sometimes arises very sharply before desperate women who are no longer able to control the situation.
The consequences of the sounded factor may end in the following imbalance in the psychological state of the wife:
- Depression … Not every representative of the fair sex is ready to answer the question of why she connected her life with this particular person. It is too late to complain about this, although many people are subject to harsh introspection after an oversight. Seeing every day how her once beloved and respected person is morally sinking, the victim of an alcoholic falls into a prolonged depression. Literally everything ceases to please her, because a constantly drunk husband is at home with all the negative consequences that follow from this.
- Low self-esteem … Even the most successful and confident woman can break down when her chosen one begins to drown his life at the bottom of the glass. The victim of a drunkard immediately raises the question of why the family tragedy happened to her. After this, the phase of self-flagellation often sets in, when the unhappy wife begins to blame herself for everything. The result is low self-esteem in a woman who has driven herself into a corner, not daring to change the prevailing circumstances.
- Isolation … Wives of alcoholics do not like to listen to the stories of their acquaintances about wealth and mutual understanding in their families. This is tantamount to when a well-fed person begins to reflect on his gastronomic addictions in front of a hungry person. Masochism is a concept that is not very common among people, because self-torture is unacceptable for human nature. Consequently, the alcoholic's wife is embarrassed by the humiliating situation her family has found herself in. She withdraws into herself, trying to be as little as possible in the public eye.
- Aggressiveness … It is often common for a person to go to extremes when someone encroaches on his honor and dignity. A once strong-minded woman, observing the daily degradation of her drinking husband, can harden the whole world. Unable to cope with personal problems in the family on her own, she is able to throw out all the accumulated negative on others.
Note! The wife of a drinking man is always a victim, so she needs to figure out how to behave with her alcoholic husband. If you let the situation that has arisen take its course, it will simply get out of control and become a real life tragedy in the form of ruined destinies.
Behavior model with an alcoholic husband
In this case, you should immediately understand for yourself that life is given to us for good deeds, and not for self-destruction. Therefore, it is necessary to take all possible measures to resolve the critical situation.
Neutrality in case of husband's alcoholism
The voiced model of behavior with an alcoholic husband is the most dangerous, because it entails long-term depression in a woman. At the same time, the victim of a drunkard makes the following conclusions for himself:
- He is not the only one … The phrase that all men drink is simply ingenious in its essence, absurdity. If a representative of a strong half of humanity is categorically against taking intoxicating drinks, then he is often given the most incredible diagnoses. He is credited with an ulcer and even coding from alcoholism, because he does not fall under the already formed stereotype of ordinary people. With the voiced neutrality, the woman does not think about how to leave her alcoholic husband. She resigned herself and is relatively calm about the drunkenness of her soul mate. It is very difficult to help her in this case, because it is impossible to help out of trouble the one who himself does not want to change something in his life.
- He has a nervous job … We are all not without sin and can sometimes allow ourselves some weaknesses. However, everything should be logically justified, because life punishes very severely for frivolity. Nerves are nerves, but at the same time reaching for a glass every time is simply irresponsible and extremely dangerous to health. However, some wives of alcoholics are ready to justify their unfortunate husbands in literally everything. At the same time, they are not able to understand that with hard drinking, a man can lose this nervous work with a rather unseemly formulation of dismissal. Only her close people whom she respects can explain the likelihood of financial and professional collapse of a loved one to an unhappy woman.
- Heredity is to blame … The neutrality of the spouse's drunkenness is very often justified by this very factor. After all, it is so convenient to blame the husband's weakness on genetics, which acted so ugly with a loved one. Such women are ready to endure their alcoholic husbands, because they consider it their duty to bear this cross endlessly. "His dad, grandfather, great-grandfather also drank" - the answer of the drunkard's passive victims to all the questions of amazed acquaintances about the reason for indulging a soul mate. In this case, one cannot do without consulting a psychotherapist, because the face is a classic example of masochism.
Aggressive behavior with alcoholism of the husband
Having considered the behavior of the passive wife of an alcoholic, it is worth dwelling on its complete opposite. Remaining in a legal marriage with a lover of strong drinks, she behaves as follows:
- Persecution of a negligent spouse … In this case, the man is simply not allowed to calmly drink a glass or two, because it is very problematic to hide from the aggressor wife. The unfortunate man does not even hope for a divorce, realizing that he has fallen into a trap to a dangerous person. However, at the same time, the woman does not understand that with such behavior she simply puts an end to her future. It is necessary to root out the problem, not try to prevent it with such persecution.
- Control of personal funds … Everyone sees the family budget differently, because it all depends on the initial agreement of both parties regarding the management of a common household. However, in some cases, the wife, in an unproductive struggle with her alcoholic husband, tries to solve the problem solely by controlling the spouse's funds. This is done in a very aggressive form, but such manipulations do not bring results, because so-called stashes appear.
- Temporary care from a drinking spouse … In this case, we are not even talking about specific aggression, but about the gesture of despair of a woman who loves her husband. In this way, she is trying to attract the attention of the second half in order to save the marriage at any cost. At the same time, blackmail on the part of an alcoholic victim is quite justified, because a certain percentage of men still react to these changes in their lives. However, you should not rely only on the sounded circumstances, because a lover of alcohol can only rejoice at the departure of his wife. After all, nothing will prevent him from drinking alcohol now without the annoying control of his wife, which used to be very annoying.
Breaking up with an alcoholic husband
Some women try to solve the problem with an alcoholic husband in the most drastic way. They have no question of what to do with an alcoholic husband, because they are willingly willing to file for divorce. In doing so, they act as follows:
- Publicity … Public opinion is quite a powerful weapon in dealing with a problem of this nature. We live in a society that often dictates an appropriate model of behavior to us. A woman who is no longer able to fight her husband's drunkenness begins to tell everyone about it everywhere. She leaves the victim of the green snake very loudly, but often for good. In rare cases, an attempt will be made to reunite the wife with a drunken drunkard, if he does not make any attempts to abandon the systematic use of alcohol.
- Submitting a statement to the police … Some ladies are not able to independently get rid of the persecution of an alcoholic husband, so they try to do everything possible to become a free and happy woman. This is quite correct behavior if the spouse began to behave inappropriately towards the children and the spouse. Aggressors need to be stopped by divorce and filing an application, because intoxicated they can cause significant harm to family members.
- Personal pressure … It is okay to tell an alcoholic that he is behaving incorrectly when packing a suitcase, but to some extent it will look illogical. Leaving - leave, as wise people say. Aggressive behavior with such an attitude towards the husband's drunkenness can end in nothing, since alcoholism rarely lends itself to personal correction.
Treatment of an alcoholic husband
The actions of a woman who loves her alcoholic husband and wants to save the marriage looks like this:
- Homeopathy … With the problem voiced, the well-known Proproten 100, which is available both in tablets and in drops, can help. This remedy is popular because it has a rather gentle effect on the human central nervous system. Proproten 100 allows alcoholics not to go into binge drinking, which is so typical for individuals who are addicted to intoxicating drinks. The rather affordable price of the drug makes it popular among people who do not have large financial resources. Its main advantage is a mild effect on the digestive organs and liver, which are already weakened after systematic aggressive attacks of alcohol. The regimen for taking the medication is quite simple: one tablet or 15 drops of the substance daily, you need to use it until you feel the effectiveness of the treatment.
- Coding … In this case, we are already talking about a serious interference in the body of an alcoholic husband. Opinions about this procedure vary, because many do not believe in a successful coding outcome. For some, this option of getting rid of the addiction helps, but for some it has no positive result. A woman who is faced with the problem of how to cure her alcoholic husband should consider all the nuances of the upcoming medical intervention.
How to behave with an alcoholic husband - watch the video:
Many wives face the problem of how to leave their alcoholic husband, whose feelings for whom have not yet cooled down. Someone is struggling with the problem to the end, and some of the fair sex just start their lives anew. In this case, it is only for them to decide, but if there is a chance to help a loved one, then why not take advantage of it.