The child's ignorance of adults. The actions of parents with similar behavior of children. The help of specialists in this difficult matter. A child ignores adults - this is the factor that should alert parents. Some isolation is not a deviation from the norm. However, an outright ignorance indicates that a conflict is brewing in the family. To avoid discord between the older and younger generations, you should seriously take up the education of your offspring.
Why does a child ignore adults
Capricious children have become quite common in society. At the same time, one should distinguish between the desire to defend one's own “I” and the refusal to respond to the requests or demands of the parents. The origins of this behavior of little obstinates should be sought in the following provocative factors:
- Search for personal space … Growing up, the child begins to understand that he is an independent person in the world of adults. Upon realizing this fact, children sometimes begin to build a barrier between themselves and their parents, who continue to take care of them like a toddler. Such a stage of growing up can pass without any serious consequences, but dads and mothers should remember about the danger of deformation of the personality of their child due to a lack of attention to him.
- Excessive curiosity … Oddly enough it sounds, but often children ignore their parents, because they do not have time to notice the essence of their moral teachings. The exploration of the world around is so absorbed by the child that he stops responding to the requests of adults. The beloved child just soars in the sky, so he does not care about the lengthy speeches of dad or mom.
- Protection from the world of adults … “I'm in the house” is the answer of such children to uncomfortable questions for them. Ignoring in this case is an attempt to get away from the requirements of the parents, which you do not want to fulfill. It is easier to pretend to be a blind-deaf child than to fulfill the request of an adult.
- Lack of willpower … This is expressed in the unwillingness to be responsible for their actions. This kind of irresponsibility is quite common among children. A child often ignores requests for the reason that he is weak in spirit and cannot frankly admit to dad and mom that he is not able to give instructions.
- Abusive behavior of parents … Excessive onslaught on the child's psyche, which has not been formed, in the future may manifest itself in the form of ignoring the older generation of the family. In this case, we are talking about a kind of protest, when children independently try to get rid of the despotism of their parents.
- Resentment towards adults … A careless word can seriously reduce the self-esteem of your own child. In response, he cannot take any significant action, so he simply ignores his stronger offender.
- Double mystery … Quite often, children stop seeing and hearing their loved ones when they learn about something forbidden, which is associated with the older generation of the family. Not wanting to hurt dad or mom, the child later withdraws into himself and ignores any attempts to communicate with him.
- Resentment towards peers … At any age, it hurts to realize the fact that you have been insulted unfairly. If at the same time close people did not support the child, then they automatically enter the zone of those persons who cannot be trusted and must be ignored.
The child's psyche is a fairly plastic material, but you should not arrange experiments to test its strength. Ignore on the part of a child is a serious sign that significant problems are emerging among loved ones.
Varieties of ignorance on the part of the child
Before meeting a family council, parents need to study child psychology. Experts classify the varieties of ignorance on the part of the child as follows:
- Provocation … In some cases, children try to reach out to those close to them through ignorance. They silently shout that they lack the warmth of their parents. As a result, such a child ignores dad and mom, while committing rather unforgivable acts.
- Blackmail … Some children are quite cunning. They can stand in a pose of silent disregard only in order to get a thing that they like from adults. After mastering the cherished present, they begin to see and hear their parents.
- Protest … In this case, we will talk about a serious offense that parents inflicted on their child. If it is not analyzed and then eliminated, then the child can ignore his dad and mom for many years.
- Despair … Ignore in this situation takes the form of the same protest, but is expressed in a more active form. Children in a crisis situation can close in themselves if they do not see support from adults.
- Demonstrativeness … Sometimes you can ignore it so loudly that it is really possible to overlap all the words spoken in anger. By getting up in a similar position, the child tries to show his worth through aggressive silence.
What to do if a child ignores adults
It is quite difficult to influence your offspring, which frankly does not want to make contact. Children ignore their parents, what to do, where to go is a favorite question of many adults. In this case, it is best to listen to the opinion of experts.
How to behave if parents are ignored by a child
It is dad and mom who are to blame for the fact that their child refuses to make direct contact with them. They need to change their behavior, which should be adjusted as follows:
- Visit doctor … Some parents are amazed to the core when they eventually realize the true reason for their child's strange behavior. When asked what to do if a child ignores adults, it is necessary to consult a specialist. It is possible that the beloved child is autistic or has hearing problems.
- Intimate talk … In any case, it is worth finding out about the problems of your offspring before deciding to punish him. The cold on his part and the unwillingness to obey the instructions of adults is quite easy to eliminate with the help of a conversation on those topics that interest the child.
- A little trick … It takes wisdom to get your children out of the state of ignorance. The obstinate definitely has some kind of weakness that needs to be exploited. Psychologists recommend that you turn to the ignoring party with a question to which she will unequivocally answer. After such a cunning strategy, a dialogue will be struck, which will lead to reconciliation of the parties.
- The manifestation of hardness … In severe cases, there is no need to resort to physical punishment, which will only aggravate the situation. The stubborn one should be told that he will not get the same dessert if he does not sit down at the table at the first request. You can refuse to provide him with pocket money, which also works effectively.
- Establishing a tactile connection … There is no need to be afraid to show your love for your offspring once again. In this case, we are not talking about endless hugs (which, by the way, also do not interfere), but about stroking the head, touching the shoulder. Thus, the child will feel that he is dear to his parents, and will stop ignoring them.
- Explaining your words clearly … Some adults do not want to understand the fact that children ignore them because they simply do not understand the requirements of adults. It is necessary to speak in the most accessible form for the child about his intentions in relation to him.
- Speaking thoughts out loud … If children ignore questions or requests, then a one-actor theater should be organized. Don't be shy about talking about your feelings out loud. The child should hear that by his behavior he is hurting his parents. At the same time, there is no need to blame him directly, because such behavior will cause another wave of aggression in him.
- Application of acting … Children will always appreciate good humor when it comes from their parents. If the child is offended and plays in silence, then it is necessary to make him laugh with a good joke. It is a positive mood that can help him start a dialogue with adults. Each phrase should be played up by offering the child, instead of “go home,” an option in the form of “let's race to the entrance”.
- Priority designation … There is no need to demonstrate your authoritarianism in issues that can be resolved peacefully. In protest, the child begins to ignore parents who do not respect him as a person. You should show your child what is of paramount importance in the family charter. He must understand that he will be in demand for the fulfillment of these very rules.
- Avoiding repetitions … The concepts that are imposed from day to day cease to be realized by the child. The same request can be voiced in different ways. The principle that repetition is the mother of learning does not apply here.
- Eliminating all conflicts between adults … In a family where parents cannot get along with each other, children are the first to suffer. Unable to influence dad and mom, they withdraw into themselves. It is necessary to sort out your relationship so that the child does not become a witness to the hot debriefing of flights.
- Joint leisure … It is difficult to ignore those adults who want to be constantly close to the little obstinate. If at the same time the child receives a maximum of positive emotions, then his blues and ignorance towards the parents will pass. Psychologists recommend systematically organizing movie trips, children's cafes and picnics.
- Sports activities together … Healthy lifestyles promoted by adults will help develop a sense of community in your child. It is not necessary for all family members to go to the gym. If a child ignores adults, it is enough to offer him to go to a swimming pool or water attractions. Water tends to relax the muscles of a person, so in this state it is easier to start a dialogue with a stubborn person.
- Keeping diaries … A child who has entered a pose should be encouraged to do something constructive. In this case, it is recommended to write down your positive and negative emotions that occurred during the day. After recording such memories on paper, you need to voice them at a general family council. Ideally, such diaries should be kept by all family members.
- Reading books together … Quite often, experts recommend familiarization with such literature as the poem by Vladimir Mayakovsky "What is good and what is bad." Using the example of this work, it is quite easy to show that it is possible to contact parents on all existing issues without ignoring them.
- Watching movies … In this case, the film "Home Alone" is suitable, when in a large family they did not see or hear their son. Exclusively on the plane, my mother realized that she was missing one child. Humor is humorous, but you shouldn't be surprised by the fact that children start to ignore their parents. After this example, it is worth inviting your child to get acquainted with the series "Daddy's Daughters", where a father with a large number of children paid attention to each of them.
- Ignore permission … In some cases, you should pause so that the obstinate understands his wrong behavior towards loved ones. You should also ignore his questions and requests until he apologizes.
- Providing an opportunity to experience adulthood … If an agreeable child has turned into a rebellious teenager, then you need to teach him a lesson. If he ignores his parents, then he may well do without their help. Let him cook, iron and wash himself for a period. After a certain time, he will definitely not like it, and the conflict will be resolved on its own.
All the recommendations voiced cannot be applied to one child, because every little personality is different. Exclusively observing the behavior of your offspring will help you choose the right strategy for eliminating his problems and complexes.
The work of psychologists when children ignore their parents
In severe cases, you need to seek help from a specialist. It is he who can help find a way out of the maze when the parents have already given up. In this case, the psychologist provides assistance of the following plan:
- Analysis … Before proceeding with the solution of the problem, it is necessary to indicate the ways of its solution. First of all, a child who ignores relatives is tested for compatibility with society. This is done in order to exclude the presence of such a thing as autism.
- Virtual ball game … After the diagnosis has been carried out, the psychologist invites his little patient to experiment a little. To do this, he asks him tricky questions about his family, to which interesting answers await. In this case, some provocation is allowed in the form of the question "do you love your mother?" The child will not be able to ignore the specialist, but the child will have to think about his attitude to the family.
- Phonemic games … This technique helps children to hear what they are told. It uses the games "Cities" (start a new word on the last letter of the previous one), "Echo" (repeat what was said many times) and "Names" (name as many names as possible). Such exercises help the child not only develop his speech, but also work out the reflex of an immediate response to a voiced question.
- Art therapy … Quite often, psychologists ask their patients to draw a flower. Children who ignore their loved ones usually depict a plant that is devoid of root and stem. The specialists then invite their little patient to finish drawing all the missing details and to voice their need.
What to do if a child ignores adults - watch the video:
If a child ignores mom or dad, you should think about the environment in which their child is brought up. The problems of children usually lie in the inability to listen to them as adults. Ignoring a child is the signal that should definitely not be dismissed. The silent battle of characters will eventually lead to the disappearance of understanding between the older and younger generations of the family.
