What is success and why its approach can cause an alarming reaction in a person. The main reasons for fear of triumph and effective methods of overcoming your fears. Success is the achievement of a specific individual goal when the assigned tasks correspond to the result obtained. Each person has his own set of characteristics that are included in the general concept of the goal. For some, these tasks represent a fleeting moment when a person gets what he wants, and for others, a big dream that is not so easy to achieve.
The mechanism of development of fear of success in humans
In most cases, everything that a person does in life or plans to do is done to achieve success. This comes at a price in every single situation. Resources are used up, a lot of time passes, and a lot of effort is expended. And now, at the finish line, when the triumph is very close, the person gives up, fears the unknown future and takes steps back.
Firstly, such a turn of events nullifies all efforts and makes it impossible to receive rewards for their work. Secondly, being left without reward, a person is deprived of the necessary motivation for his activities. Everyone needs to strive somewhere in order to find their purpose and role in this world. Desires and dreams govern and give strength to action. This is how a person searches for the meaning of life, this is how he searches for himself.
Fear of success does not allow you to achieve your goal, deprives a person of the most important joys of being, therefore, it must be detected and overcome in time.
Usually the layman is not even aware of his problem, while he is still acting according to his plan. The triumph is far away, and it is very easy to dream about what will happen next. All tasks are performed gradually, the remoteness of the result leaves time for reflection. There is an opinion that the very path to success is more enjoyable than getting what a person aspires to.
Let's say that the main achievement in life will be getting a new prestigious position with a good salary and working conditions. You can go to this if not for several years, then half your life. During this time, all the tasks and problems that stand in the way make up the meaning of each individual day. The employee gets used to the role of the performer and finds his happiness in it.
Then, at some stage, the person achieves this goal, and he is appointed to the desired position. A change of scenery does not always have a beneficial effect on him. Promotion promises not only proverbial success, but also promises changes that can bring both good and bad.
This is how the fear of being at the top of triumph is formed, to achieve everything to which it has been moving for so long and persistently. This fear can deprive a person of all the fruits of his work, significantly worsen the quality of life, and leave him without hope of fulfilling his dreams. That is why you should know how to overcome the fear of success in order to prevent such fatal mistakes.
The main reasons for fear of success
The reasons for fearing success can be very different depending on the individual characteristics of each person. Children's fears, complexes and upbringing matter. These factors, together with the temperament of the individual, can play perhaps the most important role in this problem.
Statistically, there are several main reasons that form the fear of success and stand in the way of achieving your own desires and goals:
- Someone's mind … Many people are used to listening to the advice of others, their thoughts and preferences to project onto themselves. As a result, they do not have their own opinion about their own lives, it is difficult to make important decisions and serious life steps. Having achieved any significant results, such a person always asks for advice - if he did the right thing. There is a sense of anxiety that others may not like his success. A person at such a turning point in fate may pass and fail to make the right choice, fearing not so much a mistake as being condemned by others.
- New worries … Every success brings a small victory. This is followed by a shift in tasks and the emergence of new responsibilities. A person will have to try himself in an unusual role for him, to fulfill what he is not used to. This should include conservatives - people who do not like change and feel comfortable in familiar working conditions and life in general. New responsibilities will bring a lot of hassle that not everyone wants to get involved with. That is, despite a lot of advantages, success carries with it that novelty that not everyone can accept.
- Fear of being unworthy of a new role … After achieving this goal, a new stage in a person's life follows. He is credited with a new role given his recent success. Responsibility usually increases, for which not everyone is ready. In practice, the recent goal turns out to be a little different, there is a fear of inappropriateness for the position held or one's achievements. A person is afraid to be unworthy of those heights that he himself has reached. This is because the expected success has long been an unattainable dream. Getting used to the fact that he is a reality is not easy at all.
- Low self-esteem … In this case, success overtakes a person unexpectedly and unexpectedly for himself. Routine life with monotonous tasks is gradually becoming the meaning of life. Low self-esteem determines this style as the most optimal and suitable. Reaching certain heights, which others call success, the person considers himself not good enough for this.
Signs of a person's fear of success
In order to understand how to get rid of the fear of success in oneself, it is necessary to determine its presence. For a person himself, a subjective feeling may not always be correct. In some cases, he comes up with an excuse for himself and rationalizes his actions as much as possible.
To discover the fear of success, an individual needs to ask himself a few questions:
- Does he have a specific goal;
- Does he take specific steps to achieve it;
- Is everything being done in order to quickly achieve the result;
- Have there been situations when a chance was deliberately missed;
- Have you postponed until later some important things that could lead to success;
- Did it happen that the wrong paths were deliberately chosen that led to the achievement of the goal?
Honest answers to such questions will help a person to understand for himself whether there is a fear of success.
For various reasons, a person begins to fear the moment when he reaches a certain result. In some cases, the unknown is frightening, which is fraught with new horizons, sometimes a person is afraid of the fear of not justifying the hopes expected from him.
In some cases, people are simply afraid to be left without a goal. For a long time, concrete success was a dream and an incentive to move on. When the goal is so close, there is a feeling of dread of living without motivation. If you achieve what you have long considered a dream, according to some people with a fear complex, there is no need to move forward further.
If such situations are repeated in life again and again, the likelihood of sad consequences for the person himself increases:
- Guilt … The feeling of unworthiness develops into the belief that a person is taking someone else's place. Success is considered undeserved, and usually people attribute their achievements to someone, afraid to admit them.
- Accident … The achievement of each goal is considered a pure accident, and only any praise is perceived as a rebuke or ridicule. Each success is considered only a lucky coincidence, and not the result of work and perseverance.
- Dissatisfaction … Despite their fear of being on the wave of triumph, such people often feel the incompleteness of positive impressions in life. Their work does not bring them pleasure and does not at all motivate them for future achievements.
- Bias … If a person is sure in advance that he will not succeed, then he is predetermined for this indecisive plan of his. The last most important steps for success he will never be able to complete, as he is determined to fail.
Features of dealing with the fear of success
It is very important for any individual to know how to overcome the fear of success, otherwise it will not be able to achieve even the smallest victory in life and will not receive an appropriate reward for its robot. So life becomes empty, monotonous and meaningless, because fear rules it.
The habit of acting
This method is unconsciously used by many in order to cope with a sudden wave of experiences. If fear catches up at the most inopportune moment, you need to close your eyes and go forward. So you can get rid of tormenting doubts and take decisive steps in time.
It should be remembered that fear is just a reaction of the body to certain circumstances in which a person falls, and it does not manifest itself in all people. To achieve good results, sometimes you need to be able to correctly assess the situation and deal with your phobias face to face.
First, you need to list all the advantages of an act that a person is afraid to commit. Secondly, in any incomprehensible situation, you should know what is at stake and what you can lose. Each time delving deeper into the causal mechanisms of their actions, one can understand that in fact fear is not an obstacle, but only a stimulus.
In order to teach yourself to act without looking at the fear of success, fear must be accepted as it really is. This is just an experience that can take over the thoughts and even the body of a person, but it can be easily bypassed and left behind. It is natural to be afraid, but this does not mean that we need to listen to the ridiculous arguments that dictate our fears.
This method of struggle calls not to struggle with yourself and your habits, but to let them in and learn to live with them. Despite your fear, you must act because the end result is worth it. The emotional component of each action should not affect the final outcome of the case.
Correct assessment
Each individual situation that may be affected by the fear of success must be considered individually. First, a colder, more logical approach to the solution should be taken. Thus, the emotional burden that carries fears is excluded. Secondly, the calculation of the correct actions can bear fruit, as well as leave fears overboard.
It is necessary to start from the worst case scenario. You should answer for yourself that such a bad thing can happen if success is inevitable. In most cases, the arguments will not be sufficient to convince the person to do this. So, he himself controls life, and not his emotions and fears.
Then you should consider all options for events that can lead to different results. Some of them are not very pleasant, while others can be quite useful in a certain scenario. In any case, a cold logical decision will determine the odds of failure or success.
Success is always the acquisition of new horizons, which, in addition to worries and responsibilities, also bring prospects. A positive scenario in case of success in any business is almost inevitable, so fear can deprive the most important thing - opportunities. Having missed them once, you cannot hope that everything will work out another time.
Retreating before an important life event can cost too much. Therefore, each time you miss your chances of triumph, you should understand what price you have to pay by feeding your own fears.
Purpose and result
These two concepts should be inextricably linked. A person who is afraid of success may have goals. But, unfortunately, they are never connected with the final result. Each time you retreat, a moment of triumph, reward and any other positive moments of success is delayed. By yielding, a person does not achieve the initial goals, but does nothing about it and lives on.
In order to realize all the harmfulness of the negative consequences of such fear, you need to keep a record of the results. In many cases, psychologists recommend starting a special notebook. There you should write down all the goals and desires that a person wants to achieve. Also, if possible, you should specify a method that will lead to such results. Therefore, over time, you need to close such desires with a note about their fulfillment or incompleteness.
It will be very difficult to find arguments and make another decision if your dreams indicate an initial disposition for success. Retreating in this case will not be easy. Even if cowardice prevailed for a moment, you need to write about it in your notebook for the future. So you can count the results that could have been achieved if not for fear.
Knowing what is being lost and that there is still room to make a difference works like a powerful vaccine against fears of success. The latter should be taken as a proper reward for the work done and be sure to provide for its presence in your life plan.
How to overcome the fear of success - watch the video:
The problem with fear of success in general is that it is very difficult to notice. A person may not even suspect such a condition until it destroys his life. Therefore, you need to start fighting your fears today.
